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People-Pleasing is Sucking the Life Out of You | Mindset Matters
That’s right! Your people-pleasing is sucking the life out of you. The worst problem with this is you may not realize it until you are so ingrained in the people-pleasing habits that your life isn’t the one you wanted. It isn’t the life you dreamed about. It’s someone else’s. You might be thinking this is a bit of an extreme statement. Is it? Let’s dig into the typical people-pleasing habits for those of us that are choosing or have chosen to live this way. Then I’ll show you how to start shifting that mindset so you can start managing your fears, worries, and anxiety, so you can start creating a…
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How Perfectionism Feeds Anxiety | Mindset Matters
Who here is a perfectionist? Who knows a perfectionist? We are everywhere and most of us are high-functioning-anxiety-filled-machines that may crash or implode at some point. It’s not healthy and definitely harmful to our own personal growth. My last article talked about how to handle uncertainty in life and how that links to anxiety. Today learn how perfectionism feeds anxiety and will give you some helpful hints for shifting that harmful mindset cycle. I’ve known for a while that I tend to have some perfectionist traits. However, I wouldn’t consider myself a perfect perfectionist (does that exist? I don’t know…). At any point in time, you will see me with…
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How to Handle Uncertainty in Life | Mindset Matters
Life is uncertain, that is the one thing we can count on. We may not like it but it’s a reality, even if we are killing ourselves trying to control everything possible. I was a self-proclaimed control freak and am now a recovering control freak. I personally understand the feelings that the word “uncertainty” triggers. This is why I’m going to give you some tools to learn how to handle uncertainty in life. For years I fed into the mindset that I needed to plan everything, and think about every possible risk or outcome that might happen. After all, that was part of my job when I was designing processes…
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How Practicing Mindfulness Changed My Life
I was stuck in the mad rush of life. Work, pick up kids, make dinner (or go through the drive-thru), take the kids to activities, home to prepare for the next day…rinse, repeat. I was drained, grouchy, and stressed. Life sucked for me and my family because I couldn’t figure out why I couldn’t do it all. Let me tell you how practicing mindfulness changed my life. After all, I had it all: a loving husband, kids (two at the time and now three), a home, a career I loved. Life should be good, right? I know, first-world problems. The problem was I wasn’t happy and my family was miserable…
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A Mom’s Wish for all Teen Girls | Parenting Teens
As a mom of a teen girl, I have a wish. My wish for all teen girls is for the cycle of judgment between females stop. I wish the constant need to feel better than others could be replaced by wanting to empower one another and lift each other up. Why do women feel threatened by each other? Why is there a need to judge another by the school they go to? Or the clothes they wear? Or any other ridiculous characteristic? A Mom’s Wish for all Teen Girls My daughter was excited to go to an event today. It was going to include friends and other girls that she…
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When Self-Doubt Blocks Your Dreams
Do you have that negative internal voice telling you that you aren’t enough? Telling you that what you offer isn’t unique? That others have more to offer than little old you? STOP. RIGHT. NOW. You are unique. Everyone is unique. That is precisely why this world we live in is so interesting. Here’s the honest truth. Are you ready to hear this truth? You can change this mindset when self-doubt blocks your dreams. The bottom line: Self-doubt is a barrier and it can seriously mess with your mindset. Seriously! Self-doubt is a monster of a barrier….when you let it. I’ve been there. After I left a job where my boss…
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How to Stop Minimizing Your Feelings
Why do we minimize how we are feeling and then convince ourselves that we either shouldn’t feel that way or the way we are feeling isn’t significant? NEWS FLASH! YOU are human and humans feel! However when we ignore our feelings that is when life can get chaotic. Learning how to stop minimizing your feelings may just be the biggest key to changing your mindset and start creating a life you love. The truth is we all minimize our feelings one way or another. Either we compare our personal experiences with what others are going through or we convince ourselves that feeling was “silly” and doesn’t need any attention. Nothing…
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Raising Kids to Have a Voice of Their Own
Times have changed since my youth. Some for the better and others not so much. I woke up recently stuck with the phrase, “children should be seen and not heard”, running through my head. I heard this a few times growing up. We chose a different route when raising our kids. We are raising kids to have a voice of their own while still being respectful. The parenting style that I grew up with, was not the parenting style that I intentionally chose to follow. While I love my parents deeply, I also know the thoughts I struggled with growing up. Ones that I never expressed openly, but ones that…
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Being a Control Freak Affects Your Work-Life Balance
If you are struggling with finding a work-life balance then you might just be a control freak. Don’t worry though, you aren’t alone and it’s natural for you to want control. The downside is that being a control freak affects your work-life balance. In this article, you’ll discover if you are a control freak, how being one affects your work-life balance, and how to be less of one towards others. I’m going, to be honest with you. I am a control freak and have been for many years. I am also a control freak that is constantly learning to be less controlling of others so I can create a life…
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3 Ways You are Sabotaging Your Happiness
You aren’t happy with your life but don’t know why? Are your days spent with frustration, emotional outbursts, boredom, or overwhelm? Do you want to be happier but just can’t get through a single day without something destroying it. I get it. I’ve been there. I’ve been sucked into that seemingly endless negative cycle. Life isn’t easy but here is the hard truth, you are sabotaging your happiness. Your happiness has a lot to do with not having life goals, not having the right life goals, or maybe how you are managing the progress for your life goals. (that’s a lot to take in, so I’ll explain further down) Life goals…