Why Santa Never Brings The Big Gift

It’s that time of year where parents are trying to sort out finances, schedules, and that “what to get the kids for Christmas” list. There is so much pressure to make Christmas perfect for everyone. One of the reasons why Santa never brings the big gift in our home is to simplify Christmas gift-giving, but there was so much more to this decision.

I could go into how financially our life was difficult at times because it was but in reality, this isn’t the only reason for our decision to simplify Christmas gift-giving. Christmas to us was about the family connection. We wanted that to be the focus, not the size of the gift.

We worked hard and sacrificed splurges throughout the year to make sure we had cash in our budget to pay for Christmas. Some years were better than others but Santa never brings the big gift.

Even during the “good years” Santa was consistent because we valued the work we put in to buy the gifts we could afford. Santa wasn’t going to get the credit for the big gifts, we worked hard to make that happen.

Parenting Around Social Challenges

When the kids entered school, the pressure for Tooth Fairy payouts and extravagant Santa gifts became ridiculous. Our kids would come home shocked that the Tooth Fairy paid so-and-so $20 for a tooth, but yet they only got $2.

Then Santa gave so-and-so an iPhone in Grade 3. Why didn’t they get a big gift from Santa?

We even had to stop having Christmas morning celebrations with some family because Santa gave our kids a small gift and the cousins got everything from Santa. The traditions were just too different and it was too hard to watch the confusion in my kids’ faces.

We managed through those years by making Christmas traditions for our home focused around family connection more than the gifts. Now that the kids are older, that is what they appreciate and what they crave when they tell us they are coming home for Christmas.

Simplify Christmas Gift Giving

Have you ever given your child the best gift ever, just to have them forget about it a few minutes later? When we are planning our Christmas list we take into consideration the budget and each child’s personality. We sometimes buy gifts but sometimes we lean towards gifting experiences.

One year we signed our son up for guitar lessons. He had wanted to take lessons and we found an instructor that was able to work with our family schedule.

Last year was a decent year and we were able to purchase a few items that our son needed, so he could to continue working towards his dream. Even these are considered “gifts”, it meant more to him that we were able to help him get closer to his dream.

As the kids got older we talked to them about “quality not quantity”. They knew that Christmas was more than how many gifts they were getting. To them it became that dedicated time with nothing truly scheduled, pajama days playing games and eating Christmas leftovers.

This year we are looking at what experiences we could give our kids. Two out of three kids have jobs and live away from home. Nobody truly “needs” anything so we are looking at each individual person and making a list of experiences they would enjoy but may not splurge for themselves.

In the end, if we gave them nothing on Christmas day the kids would be coming home for one tradition. It isn’t the Santa stockings on Christmas morning, it is the games we play on Christmas Eve. Last year the two youngest refused to start Christmas Eve without our oldest. That warmed my heart and I knew then that focusing on the family connection was worth every social challenge and the hard decisions over the years.

This year I challenge you all to simplify Christmas gift-giving and make Christmas about family connections. Santa doesn’t need to bring big gifts to make Christmas special.