Parenting perfection is over-rated

Parenting perfection is over-rated. Why do we pretend to be right all of the time, or never admit we need help? Are you the perfect “supermom” that does it all and only breaks down behind your bedroom door quietly?

I admit this was me and it was exhausting. Striving to be the perfect mom to my kids. Expecting perfection from myself and chastising myself when I ultimately failed.

Then one day I snapped. The stress of work, and trying to be the perfect mom was too much. I had worn myself out and life at home was horrible.

The kids were on edge all of the time and didn’t want to make a mistake because then mom would be stressed and yell at them again. I never slowed down enough to enjoy spending time with the kids.

I wanted more out of life.

This isn’t how I wanted to raise my kids.

Parenting Perfection is Over-Rated

What if you could create a better life for yourself and your family by being more authentic around the kids? Learning about growth mindsets is a hot topic in the personal development industry.

Using situations to learn from your mistakes or to help you improve yourself further helps you grow individually. It can also help the family bonds grow stronger because they find ways to work together, and honesty is present in your daily life.

Living in the perfect bubble, trying to keep up appearances to others and to our kids only makes life harder than necessary. Kids learn that they have to be perfect all of the time, and if they make a mistake then there is pressure to hide that failure.

When this happens, trust is lost between loved ones and relationships suffer. Life becomes more chaotic and spins out of control very quickly.

There is a balance between letting the world see your personal problems and striving to “keep up with the Joneses”. Kids don’t need to be burdened with all of the issues happening in the home, however, if you are stressed they pick up on that.

Modeling Growth Helps Kids

Finding simple ways to talk to your family will help them know they don’t have to be perfect. They can make mistakes, own them and learn from them.

Be honest with them about needing their help around the house to help reduce some of mom’s stress.
Be honest with them about wanting to slow life down, simplifying the schedule because you are craving more family time.
Were there unexpected expenses this month that strained the budget? Be honest with them about how you feel guilty about not being able to give them what they want when they want it.
Be honest about how you need a mom timeout when overwhelm is consuming you. Seeing you take care of yourself teaches them how to take quiet moments for themselves as well.

Finding ways to express your feelings without providing an extra burden for your children is a balance. The key is to not burden them with worry but to help them learn that parenting perfection is over-rated.

Parents aren’t perfect but we strive to learn from our mistakes and improve life bit by bit. The kids will then learn that they too can make mistakes, and learn from them so they can get better.

It’s time to redefine supermom. Learning to model how to ask for help, how to manage money, how to overcome challenges, and how to admit mistakes and learn from them. Pretending that we can do it all with perfection only hurts the kids.

As a mom, there is freedom in being able to be authentic with the kids in a way that they can learn from your own mistakes. Finding ways to show them honest mistakes or struggles. Then letting them see how you are striving to improve, helps them learn about themselves too.

It is empowering to them when they can see that if they make a mistake, they too can learn from it and get better. They can learn to be more compassionate and help around the house, working together as a team to simplify life bit by bit.