Forgiving Divorce

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Divorce is messy and forgiving divorce may seem messier, but it may not be as messy as you may believe. I know this from an outside perspective watching my parents try to be there for me in ways they had to split themselves apart doing. They divorced when I was young, and while I wasn’t part of the court proceedings, I saw the results and felt the results as their child. I did this by trying to not fall into their pathway and repeat it also.  It was difficult, and there were many moments where I flipped and tossed around my own emotions trying to figure out love for them and myself.

As a child, I asked why the divorce; if there was love. It broke my dad. He couldn’t answer me. I wouldn’t ask my mom, because the bitterness and anger was evident. He would distance himself from us, as this was his pattern for handling what he could. My mom would project outward seeking and grabbing onto what she could for a life preserver. Years later, the Lord helped me become a coach and healer and I helped my mom not be within this type of pattern, as much. She felt the calling to break free of the burdens of divorce from my father, and the battles she continued fighting within her marriage with my adopted dad. This is where the covenant fits and is an uplifting promise of love from the Lord God Almighty. It was a journey to uplift her love for life, herself, and my dad.

I saw my mom continue to rise up and then cycle at times, struggling within her current marriage. It wasn’t until my father passed away and then years later that I saw the connection to what may have been going on. It is the spiritual commitment in love that had my mom tethered to my father. When my father passed away, the tether released. Now with the covenant there is a method or potential journey whereby the cycles can be lessened to create a smooth road ahead.

The bottom line is this.

I have coached my mom into loving her life and seeing her second marriage in new light even during rocky roads of arguments. She changed so much my dad didn’t know what to do with this. He was walking around expecting the shoe to drop. He couldn’t see her happiness, because of a impoverished trust between the two of them. There was an opening one day, where he expressed his concern and I questioned why he didn’t see her change as being happy in life. He went within and the pathways were easier for her and him, when he allowed himself to see this part of her through his own struggles in life. Were they on the road to divorce? No, I saw his love language for my mom, she just needed to be reminded to see it and learn it also.

This article is for those divorced, a child of divorce, a child from divorce, and maybe those on the path towards divorce. If you are on the path for divorce, please find it within you to seek a journey to know love within your marriage. The emotions, beliefs, and actions can be faced. This is what I know, and I know this because a previous marriage or dating relationship follows a person and can influence a reaction and impoverish perspectives and love. Often this comes as a blind side that one may believe is what the person standing before them is feeling, but it isn’t. It is the energy from the past pushing from you that you are discerning. Don’t expect the vibe you pick up as them. This goes for both of you.

The road towards divorce is not an easy road to be on, as a child, nor adult. Making this choice is a difficult, and one you are Loved through.

This article is also for those that may have fell into a judgment with regards to divorce.

The pathways for forgiveness are there for you, and the inspirational nudge may fit a life goal of love you have for yourself, your family, your career, your future.

Forgiving Yourself and Others for Divorce

When one hits a moment of memories that aren’t wanted to be thought of, there is a reason. The reason is simple, even if the journey doesn’t feel simple nor easy.

Memories of the past are being reflected upon as a way to show you the inspirational connection to your goal of love for your life.

If they are a blessing, it is for learning and desiring more of this in connection to a potential opportunity.

If they feel heavy, it is your soul asking you to release the burdens from before so you can walk the good pathways you know are possible with ease.

Releasing these burdens through a forgiveness journey helps heal the cells within you, the visions you have for your life open up, and love felt and expressed is lifted to feel bigger.

I said before divorce is messy. So is reacting to it. The shrapnel extends for miles and miles for most. Gossip as one tries to find balance in ways they feel they need to seek support. This could be from within the break up or from outside perspectives that are struggling. Short tempers, punishments for the kids for being kids, and all while trying to find love within yourself and within your commitment that you made within a love.

Whether these moments or others that I haven’t mentioned are happening now, or years ago. If you are triggered and find the emotions pulled or something deeper lands, explore the pathway for forgiveness. It cleanses and heals love.

When someone asks me how to forgive divorce and the relationships prior to the marriage also, there is a weight shown in that moment of the burdens that are recognized. The journey for forgiveness can be seen as a dark one filled with angst and a rising of the pain, trauma, abuse, and a fear for a recognition of the love that was. The reason for this fear is the spiritual contracts of love that became either before marriage or within marriage.

This is what I do.

The burdens recognized are within the right hand.

The left hand holds the level of love you envision for your life going forward.

Choosing to lift the burdens through forgiveness helps bring balance in beautiful ways.

The burdens lighten, healing your energy and cells within your body.

The love lifts and you begin to see possibilities and wonderous ways to live life.

With each uplift of Love you accept in response as you are forgiving divorce, you will get to know the value and worth the Lord sees within you.

You get to receive and know more happiness, joy, and prosperity.

Now envision your life as you walk down the street towards a goal of yours. Prosperity is not necessarily about money. Prosperity is knowing a smile without a distraction. The people watching you walk may smile as they enjoy knowing you are expressing your unique self. The uplift of love is you seeing it in this way, instead of believing they were leering at you or mocking you. The past energy of what was within those burdens isn’t there distracting what a loving reaction to life is.

You get to envision your family, friends, peers, and others in new ways. 

As you enjoy seeing their uniqueness, by getting to know more about who you are within your uniqueness also.

You get to see value and worth, and know the uniqueness of others as a blessing.

Uplifting love within your life is the reason for forgiving divorce.

With each forgiveness you choose to be part of, you will know Love in bigger ways.

The patterns in life, the longer you wait for any type of forgiveness deepen. Often this relates to anxiety disorders, and disease within your body and life. It isn’t worth holding the burdens and avoiding the forgiveness any longer. Just do what is needed so you begin to see the rainbows in your life being a promise of love being uplifted in hope for your future.